It is easy to find, now many families children all love speak conditions, make the parents are very upset.
Both practice and learning, and even the little things in life.
In fact, the children love speak conditions, children is not inherent, but parents step by step, until the child's condition, the demand is higher and higher, more and more parents can't accept, just think like this, you can't, have to find a way to solve the, something they really can't stand it.
Better still need who tied the bell & throughout;
, really want to solve the problem, but also parents need patience, wisdom and skills.
And parents to reflect on their previous practice.
Whether to make their children do one thing, to complete a task, to reach a purpose, just to give children a, exchange, such as & other;
Like to play the piano
, do homework, reward 5 yuan & throughout;
And so on.
So, and, over time the child will gradually learn the & other;
To the deals with you & throughout;
When they want to achieve a certain purpose, will be for parents and other
Exchange & throughout;
And parents on a child's every compromise or meet, will strengthen the child's & other;
Conditions & consciousness throughout;
So, in the process of education child, try to let the child in & other;
Unconditional & throughout;
On learning, doing things.
In the long term, children are accustomed to this kind of condition, what to do, rather than strings attached.
Second, the parents speak truth, stimulate the intrinsic motivation.
Some parents don't think about children learning, practicing and doing things the meaning and reason.
Always think to give a little & other;
Stimulation & throughout;
Will cause the child's reaction, which may temporarily, but will not continue for a long time.
Because there is a external motivation and internal motive in psychology problems, we might as well look at the following story: a group of children playing in front of an old man, cry bitterly.
A few days in the past, the old man is really unbearable.
So he gave 10 cents per child, said to them,.
You make here is busy, I feel a lot younger, the money thanks.
Children are very happy, the second day still come, continue to play.
The old man to get out again, for 5 cents per child.
5 cents also can also, children are still happily go.
On the third day, the old man gave only 2 cents per child, the children flew into a rage, & other;
Only 2 cents a day, know not to know how hard we, & throughout;
They swear to the elderly, they would never play for him.
In this story, the old man's way is very simple, he will be the children's internal motivation & other;
For their happy and play & throughout;
Turned into the external motivation & other;
Play for cents, & throughout;
The external factors, and he manipulated the cents, so the children's manipulation.
This is what people say desi effect, have appeared in family life.
For example, often said to the children, parents & other;
If you got 100 points, is to grant you 100 dollars & throughout;
If you could get into the top five, reward you a new toy & throughout;
And so on.
Parents may not think that it is this inappropriate exchange and reward mechanism, the child's interest in learning bit by bit to reduce, caused not give conditions, do not satisfy yourself, don't do.
So the parents let them study, practice and doing things, he will mention all conditions, caused the passive situation of the parents.
Therefore, parents should explain the meaning of learning, practicing and doing things and related truth, guide the children to set up the lofty ideal, enhance children into doing things to learn, practice, feelings and interests, and promote their motivation of learning itself, help children gain the fun of learning, from the internal motivation will continue to promote their learning, practicing and do other things.
Three, less incentives and more spiritual reward.
Children are small, sometimes give appropriate incentives, can really play a role, but as the children grew up day by day, the rising of knowledge, rich spiritual world, the parents in spirit encouragement may be more important.
Children speak conditions, basically be material conditions, if meet, long time will continue to stimulate his material desires, focus on & other;
Material comforts & throughout;
Instead of learning.
What's more, material desires expansion, resulting in the illegal crime.
So, want to advocate more spiritual encouragement, such as hugging, touching, verbal praise and so on, and embrace itself can compromise for children and the compromise and substance for compromise, tend to be beneficial, because I believe that you can embrace the message is well done, you also have the responsibility to do well.
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